Red Crush

This isn’t wine - it’s a comeback moment in a movie no one told you was about you. Red Crush is juicy, dramatic, and not here to be polite. You brought it over as a gift and then drank it all yourself. So Hot You’re Hurting My Feelings is the soundtrack: theatrical, catchy, dangerously composed. Sip it slow. Or don’t. Either way, you’re texting with too much confidence and absolutely no punctuation.